“Integrity: The Courage to Meet the Demands of Reality” by Henry Cloud Essay

The deem titled Integrity The courage to Meet the Demands of Reality by Dr. Henry taint, shed a whole new light on the subject of righteousness for me. My original fancying of integrity was to do the pay off thing even when no one is watching, scarcely this book challenged my commentary and the applications to my decl atomic number 18 own(prenominal) life and work experience. By imageing integrity as the courage to neat the demands of reality, I will be subject to focus on improving my best traits and aim a striking attraction. tarnish explains in his book how six essential qualities determine your success in business establishing trust, being orient toward truth, packting results, embracing the negative, being oriented toward increase, and being oriented toward transcendence. I will give my personal educated reaction to each one of these qualities. One of the most classic thought processs Cloud starts mentioning in his book, is that of the combust, defined as the result we collapse behind (pg. 17).I agree with Cloud that in that location are ii aspects to the wake, the task and the relationship side. I was especially moved by development that the two sides of the wake must be equally strategic and contri exclusivelyed to. Unfortunately, on that point contrive been umpteen convictions in my life when I stick either focused on the task more(prenominal), or the relationship side of the wake I was leaving behind. Looking back, I now watch why I harbor not been reached by bulk from old jobs, where being the top performer was my priority. But I also understand now, that it was because of the great wake I left behind, that some of my previous colleagues whitewash show appreciation, respect, and adoration for me, even though I was a discontinue performer than them. It is a great feeling to be able to incite mickle and bring out the best in them for many eld tocome. After reading this book, I now understand how to use the w ake tool to make me a permit on person and a better draw in my personal life but also my career.On rogue 24, Cloud gives his definition of constituent as the ability to meet the demands of reality which shook my perception that character reference couldnt change. Cloud was genuinely successful in making me see how the demands of reality determine the requirements of the design, and that character is changeable. From now on, I will not tho try to break my own character, but I will also push people around me to be the best character they crumb be. It has not been effortless to meet the demand of my reality, such(prenominal) as being a private m some other, being a great fulltime graduate student, being a obedient fulltime employee showing high performance results while expression long abiding relationships with colleagues and customers, being a neat daughter, sister, smashner, a healthy and beautiful adult female etc. I now truly understand why some(prenominal) top performers in my company have been let go all over the years because of the fact that their character did not meet the demands of the reality in spite of appearance the company, the employees and the customer base we are trying to provide excellent products and go to. I especially loved it when Cloud mentioned that people grow and people change when the right experiences are brought to the person, and they have the right response in using those experiences (pg. 27).One of the most important aspects of establishing trust, tally to Cloud is square listening and understanding, which occurs only when the other person understands that you understand (pg. 60). This idea heart-to-heart my eyes wide and do me understand how I must become better at showing to the people around me that not only I listen to when they have to say, but I truly understand them and their situation. Since reading this part of the book I have tried real unvoiced every day at work to show empathy and perta in with my coworkers and not just my customers, winning their hearts by showing that I genuinely care for their success as frequently as mine. The other two ways of establishing trust according to Cloud are done extending favors and through vulnerability. I could not agree more with the author in that a good leader cannot just set the demand, he or she must do anything to help the people meet that demand. I have seen this theory with my General Manager being a part of the team, works as hard as we do toward the same goal, for our store to be as successful as we are.Throughout my life I have been able to establish trust in my personalrelationships, such as with my son, by extending favors and helping people not only understand the demands but also accomplishing them. Being vulnerable is another very important part to building trust, as mentioned by Cloud on page 92. cracking leaders must be strong enough to depend on, but vulnerable enough to identify with. This is a whole new notion for me, because I have always thought that not showing your weaknesses made you a good role model. I will definitely let my guard down now and accept my imperfections and admit to being a work in progress myself. The second important fibre to be a successful leader according to Cloud is to be oriented toward the truth by being in touch with reality.On page 104 Cloud mentions how the consequences of deceit are usually greater than the ones of the truth. I could not agree more with this concept, especially because I was cheated on from my keep up and was really hard for me to find out that what I thought was true, it had not been true all along. Being oriented toward the truth builds trustworthy relationships forever and a day in every aspect of life. A new concept for me that I will incorporate in my life from now on, is the concept that Cloud mentions on page 117 that you will excel only by increase your strengths, never by fixing your weaknesses. Even though it does soun d hard to do, I am determined to put it to practice in my own life with all my relationships.The third quality important to success mentioned by the author is that of getting results. Cloud says that one of the most important aspects of character that leads to success is the ability to keep going when we hit an obstacle, believe that there is a way to get it done, and keep going until we find it. I have had to learn this lesson personally in a hard way, since I have hit rock bottom many times, and have had to get up and fight and move on, and end up stronger than before. The fourth quality to a successful leader mentioned in Clouds book is the ability to embrace the negative. I could not agree more with Cloud in when he says that the ones who succeed in life are the ones who gather in that life is largely about solving problems. I have had to pickle with this concept myself many times in my life, and every time I have decided to take the problems head on instead of ignoring them, I have grown as a character myself while building stronger relationships.I have also had to work with several managers who avoideddealing with problems, which contradicts the idea Cloud points out on page 179 that the leaders who are view are the ones who can be depended on to deal with things directly and competently. This concept reiterates my belief to why employees did not respect those managers I mentioned above. version from Cloud that if they have to have others like them, or not be upset with them, then solving problems becomes virtually impossible on page 184, convinces me even more that solving problems as they come, no matter how cock-a-hoop or small they are, will make me a better leader and role model for everyone around me.I am so lofty to say that I work with great leaders who do scarcely what Cloud mentions in his book its not useful to squeeze other people up when they make mistakesto the contrary thats the time to coach, encourage them, and help then regain their confidence (pg. 190). I am learning from the best, hands on, every day at work, and I potently believe that because I am using the same concept in my relationships, I will soon become a great leader as well.The remnant two character dimensions important to success according to Cloud are oriented toward increase and oriented toward transcendence. The idea presented in this book that managers are good maintainers, while leaders are good growers, makes me elucidate why I have taken so much pride and joy in helping coworkers and friends grow in the last few years, because I am working on growing myself and worthy a great leader (pg. 207). This also touches the concept of being exceeding in order to be successful, especially when Cloud mentions that it truly is more blessed to give than to receive (pg. 253). A fairly new concept for me though, that I truly enjoyed learning about is that the greatest people are the ones who have not sought greatness, but served greatly the caus es, values, and missions that were much larger than themand by joining and serving those, we see greatness emerge (pg. 243). From my personal life I have observed how not being prodigious can hold someone from being a good leader, such as those people who believe they are the center of the Universe.This book was a great eye opener for me personally and made me question many of my traits and experiences. I now can connect the six character dimensions unneurotic within myself and using my best traits to become even better. Themost important conclusion I arrived at after reading Integrity The Courage to Meet the Demands of Reality by Dr. Henry Cloud, is that to become a successful leader in life I must understand why I might have some gaps to work on, accept myself and realize that there is nothing wrong with having gaps, and know what to do next to reply them (pg. 265). I will for sure share this knowledge with as many people around me as I can, so that I can help them grow togeth er with me.